|Motivating children - Making
winners of your children
every parent's dream to see their child become an achiever
and a success in the eyes of the world. But not every child
can be a Sachin Tendulkar or an Amitabh Bachchan or a Sameer
Bhatia or an Indira Gandhi - or can they? What is it that
distinguishes these children - fate, their destiny or perhaps
something more concrete? Is fame and glory the only characteristic
of a winner or can ordinary people also be classified as winners?
Lets take a look at the answers as we try and isolate the
factors that go into the raising of a winner!
believe in themselves - Perhaps the most important thing
that you can do for your children is to teach them to trust
and believe in themselves independent of what the rest of
the world is saying. For many of us, this is also the toughest
thing that we can do because in setting up our children to
follow their own instincts and dreams, we also erode our own
authority and influence. After all if you teach your child
that her own self-respect
is more important than your approval, it's bound to backfire
a few times. But without instilling this sense of self in
the child, you can forget about creating a winner because
those who look outside themselves for approval will always
follow rather than lead.
are disciplined -unfortunately; dreams require hard work
and discipline to become
realized. Discipline incorporates qualities like self-motivation
and the ability to persistently and consistently put in dedicated
work regardless of the visible results. Children who achieve
things too easily in terms of academic, social or financial
success often cannot summon the necessary grit to keep going
when faced with tough situations. It therefore becomes your
responsibility to see that your children are exposed to a
fine mix of things that they can do easily (bolsters self
esteem) and those that stretch their capabilities a little.
enjoy what they do - parents who push their children into
fields more suited to parental or security needs are less
likely to enjoy the pride of parenting a winner. Sometimes
it pays to support your children in the pursuit of their interests
even when they seem silly or socially inadequate. While there
are a lot of people with talent and hard work, the cutting
edge is provided by passion - a wholehearted dedication to
the work at hand!
see themselves in control - the parents of winners don't
teach them that fate or destiny is the controlling influence
in their lives and nor do they make themselves out to be helpless
victims. What they do teach their children is that hard work
and determination usually gets results but if not, well in
the immortal words of Scarlet O'Hara, tomorrow's another day!
are not afraid of failing - The most well known figures
have recovered from failure innumerable times. The fear of
failing or depression generated from failure is one of the
surest methods to becoming a loser. So tell your children
again and again - and believe it yourself - nothing worthwhile
is achieved without trial and error and failure is the stepping
stone to success. Or as another several times failed winner
put it - Try, try and try again till you succeed!
a winner doesn't always translate into social and material
success. But if your child has these qualities and is a decent,
caring, loving person besides, then she's already a winner
- and so are you for raising her!