A
very important question for most parents is when to begin potty training
a child. You may have already been told by your elders that a child should
be potty trained in the first year itself. The sad reality is; however,
that before about 2 years of age it is not the child that is trained,
but the parent. You can learn to anticipate and prevent but at this stage
she has not even learnt to associate that stuff with herself. And nor
does she have any control over herself as yet.
True toilet
training means helping a child to recognize his own full bowel or bladder
and then to do something about it-like telling his mother or going to
the pot. He cannot begin to be trained until he can recognize his own
'need to go'.
Until around
15 months old your child passes bowels and urine automatically. He doesn't
know when he is doing it or even when he has done it. By 1 ½ year
he connects the feeling of urination or passing a motion what is produced.
Now he knows after he has performed but still doesn't know when he is
going to do so.
| Physiological
readiness begins only after 20 months or so |
|
Signs of
potty readiness you should watch for -
- Regularity
and predictability of bowel movements.
- Awareness of such movements in the toddler.
- An interest in being clean and dry.
- Ability to communicate the need.
- Ability to pull down underpants.
- Curiosity in the bathroom habits of others and a desire to imitate these
habits.
| Bowel
movement control will come before bladder control. Between noticing
the sensations of a loaded rectum and actually passing the motion
a child has plenty of time to get to the pot. But there is no
time at all between noticing a coming pee and producing a flood. |
|
When the
majority of signs point to his readiness to be trained, try these tips
for making the training easier on both of you-
- Switch
from nappies to underpants.
- Bare his
bottom occasionally so that he notices his body functions
- Watch
him closely to pick up minute signals just before he needs to go sit
on the potty.
- Check
his timings closely and encourage him to sit on the potty when he is
due for a bowel movement.
- Don't
force him to do anything he doesn't want to do or the training sessions
will be completely unproductive.
- Make a
'sh...' sound or turn on the tap to encourage the flow of urine.
- Remember,
even if he reports after the event, it's a step in the right direction
- Be an
enthusiastic audience but not so enthusiastic that your toddler gets
suspicious and uncooperative.
- Motivate
him by explaining that sitting on potties is what older children do
or by giving small rewards. Children like to imitate their parents,
so can try explaining to him how mammy and papa sit at the potty.
- Show him
how to check himself for dryness regularly. Make a habit of asking him
regularly but casually whether he needs to go "potty".
- Be patient
with relapses.
What not to
do : -
- Don't expect too much too soon.
- Don't punish, scold or ridicule for failure to get it right.
- Don't deny drinks especially at night, in the hope of preventing bedwetting.
- Don't give suppositories or enemas to encourage bowel movements at
the time of your choosing. Such a practice can be extremely dangerous.
- Don't nag him - it will only build up his resistance besides making
him self-conscious and possibly constipated.
- Don't force the issue (or the child) to sit or remain on the potty.
- Don't make toilet training good or bad - it is just a skill that he
will eventually acquire, not a statement of his worthiness or otherwise.
- Don't discuss progress or lack of it in front of the child.
Don't take slow progress personally - it is not a reflection on you
or your parenting style.
- Don't give up hope.
| Bladder
training willcome once the child learns to 'clench his bottoms'
for momentary control over coming urine. The muscles that enable
him to do this are too low down for efficient control till his
body is ready for it. |
|
Even after
she becomes fairly proficient, accidents will still happen. The main causes
are -
- Stress - any major change will trigger accidents.
- Fatigue
- Excitement
- Concentration on some other activity
- Parental pressure
- Waiting until the last minute or inability to lower the pants fast enough.
- Urinary Tract Infection.
- Physical problem causing leakage
In case of
the last two medical treatment should be sought. But such cases are rare
- if you are patient, you may find that the dreaded battle never takes
place at all. Once a child finds out that "dry" is better than
"wet", she will learn sooner or later to use the potty. So don't
worry - a relaxed approach is much more likely to get you quick and positive
results than worrying.
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